on the realization I had about motherhood

motherhood, fatherhood, and where I'm currently at on the topic of kids

I’m feeling a bit nervous to send out this newsletter. I was recently asked how I overcome fear around opening up on the internet. And the truth is: I don’t know if I have overcome that fear. It always feels a bit scary to put something out there that people might not like or that people might take issue with. I am certainly not a perfect human being and don’t always get it right.

My focus in the content I share on the internet has always been about connecting with others who might be feeling something similar. I want to make people feel less alone. And maybe what I’m talking about today will be that for you. Maybe it won’t be. But I hope something I say in the future *will* be that for you.

So, here we go…

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I don’t know if I want to have kids. I’ve talked a lot about my decision to probably not have kids on social media. But the keyword has always been probably. Because the truth is: I’m not 100% sure what I want.

[Content warning: Lots of talk about having children or not having children ahead. I know that not everyone is in a headspace to read this kind of content and totally understand if this is a topic for you to skip right now. Sending you a big virtual hug 💗]

As someone who is vocal about my own uncertainty when it comes to motherhood, I’ve had the opportunity to connect with a lot of woman on this topic. Because of this, I’ve noticed an interesting theme that gave me my own A-ha! moment.

But more on that behind the paywall below.

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I’m still reading Dead Romantics by Ashley Poston. Things have been a bit busy lately and I’m not reading as much as I’d like to even though I *love* this book about a woman who is totally falling for a ghost…

I can’t stop listening to Olivia Rodrigo’s new album GUTS. Even though I’m 33, this album brings me back to how I felt in my teen and early 20s.

This week it’s something I’m drinking: Oat draft lattes with vanilla from La Colombe. They are so creamy and delicious.

Drag Race UK Season 5. I kind of love all the queens this season. The thought of any of them getting eliminated makes me sad. Anyone else watching? Which queens are you rooting for?

I’m picky about sweaters as I find most to be really itchy. This sweater though is SO soft!

I rented it from Nuuly (←get $20 off your first month) but I’m considering keeping it…

The NY Times game Connections. It’s a bit confusing to explain, but essentially you have to group words together that fall under a category. Sometimes you have to think of multiple meanings or uses for a word. It’s like a fun little brain teaser.

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Now back to the topic of having kids…