on feeling lonely and what I'm doing about it
(how to make friends and find community in your 30s)
Earlier this year I had a big revelation: I’ve been feeling lonely.
I spend a lot of time alone. I live alone and I work from home. As an introvert I love my alone time — I thrive when my only plans for the day are to read a book. I’m great at amusing myself and very comfortable with my own company.
Even so, I was starting to wish that I wasn’t alone so much.
I was nervous to admit my loneliness out loud — the word lonely has such an icky connotation to it. But as I started opening up more about this feeling on Instagram, it’s become abundantly clear that *so* many of us (dare I say pretty much all of us!?) feel lonely to some extent.
Now that I’ve finally started admitting to myself that yes, I do feel lonely, I’ve been able to start doing something about it. I’ve been making more of an effort to make new friends, reconnect with old ones, and build connections. But more on that in a second…
I finished reading The Dead Romantics, a romance about a ghostwriter who can also talk to ghosts. I’d say I liked the book but didn’t love the book. The premise was super interesting and I liked the romance aspect of it, but it felt like it could’ve been 50 pages shorter.
I also started reading Maybe Once, Maybe Twice after a few friends highly recommended it to me. Singer Maggie Vine has just turned 35. While her career is finally starting to pick up, her love life? Not so much.
She made a promise with her best friend, Garrett, that if they were both single at 35 they’d get married. Well, the time has come but turns out he’s now engaged. Enter her former camp boyfriend, Asher, who is now a very successful movie star.
The book goes back and forth between the current timeline and moments from the last 20 years of Maggie’s life. So far I’m enjoying the book, I’m a sucker for dual timelines and second-chance romances.
Update: As I’m editing this on Friday morning, I’m obviously listening to 1989 (Taylor’s Version)
Britney Spears’ much-anticipated memoir The Woman in Me came out on Tuesday. I absolutely devoured the audiobook in about 24 hours. I don’t like reading non-fiction in general — I need plot, story, and characters to keep me invested! But I’ve found that I can get into non-fiction books via audiobooks.
Learning more about what was going on behind the scenes for Britney Spears is really devastating, there’s so much sadness and trauma in her story. It’s got me thinking a lot about the price of fame and all of the expectations around famous people, especially those who rise to fame as young women.
This one is more food-related, but a new Wegmans opened up in my neighborhood. The mega grocery store hails from upstate New York and is known for having amazing prepared foods and relatively low prices. The new location at Astor Place is shockingly massive and jam-packed with great food options. I’m excited to have them nearby now!
The Eras Tour movie! I went to see the movie with a friend over the weekend and it was EVERYTHING.
I wasn’t sure how I’d feel about seeing the concert in movie form — would it capture the same magic as if you were IRL? While yeah, nothing beats the experience of a live concert, the movie experience was its own special thing. At my showing, there were young girls dancing in the front row throughout. People were singing along. I still got chills and had big feels throughout. I’m glad I went and highly recommend it if you’re a Taylor Swift fan.
These crew socks are my fave with sneakers in the fall and winter.
I went to see the Merrily We Roll Along revival on Broadway with Daniel Radcliffe, Jonathan Groff, and Lindsay Mendez. I’ve always loved this musical told in reverse about 3 best friends and how fame changes them, but this production was something special. If you’re in New York and have a chance to see it GO!
Now, back to loneliness and making friends in your 30s
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